Tag Archives: children

Wordless Wednesday: Bottles of Water

Bottle 1

Bottle of water on the island, half full!

Bottle of (hall-full) water intermixed with toys!

Bottle of (hall-full) water intermixed with toys!

Bottle of water under the couch!

Bottle of water under the couch!

The list and pics of  half utilized bottles of water lurking about our home can go on and on and on.
By the way, whenever I ask any of the three children, “Whose water is this?” I consistently get the answer, “Not mines!”
I have vowed, NOT to buy anymore bottles of water. Not only will water bottles NOT litter the apartment any longer, but I’ll also do my part in preserving mother earth!
Done deal!

Happy Wordless Wednesday!

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Open Letter: To My Daughters

I think it’s every mother’s dream to have a precious little daughter. We all want a daughter to dress up all pretty and comb her hair up into pigtails with the world’s prettiest bows. Each of would like to have that little girl who’ll grow up and one day be one of our closest friends. How lucky am I? I got blessed doubly — I have two of the world’s greatest girls, as my daughters.

My Two Girls!

My Two Girls!

Dear Girls,

Every day I express gratitude for both of you. I’m so proud to call myself your mother. I’ve loved each of you since the moment I learned of your existence. You two have a long lives ahead of you, still I’m extremely proud of who you are today.
My dream is for both of my girls to go out and bless the world with their strengths, charm and sheer awesomeness! Priceless traits that my parents blessed me with, I hope to continue passing onto the both of you.
I have no doubt that you two will change the world, as you’re armed with an exuberant amount of intelligence, charm, wit and brilliance.
No matter who or what comes up against you, keep your feet firmly planted and heels driven in the earth and always remember who you are, where you came from and what you’re capable of.
You are priceless prizes and nothing will ever change that! Remember to always use your powers for good (wink).

Love You Both Always,

Your Proud Mother

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Porn and Your Child

This child has not been found guilty of any pornography watching. He has yet to reach the statistical age of 11. Whew! (wipes forehead)

Does anyone find it alarming that the average age at which a child, is thought to,  view pornography for the first time is age 11?  To me, it’s startling, alarming and upsetting, particularly since I have four children of my own. On top of that, two of my four children have yet to reach the age of 11. I have one boy and one girl child left, under that statistical age, and those statistics really make me nervous. I don’t want my pre-adolescent children viewing porn, and I don’t want them thinking that it’s okay, if they do. That leads me to the reason that I wrote this post. Have my older two children, who have surpassed the previously mentioned statistical age,  ever surfed the web for pornography? Have they watched XXX movies or looked in the adult magazines?

Before talking to my children, I first decided to talk to several of my friends to get their perspective on children/teens and porn. After speaking to them, admittedly I was rather surprised at their responses. No one was as shocked and dismayed as I was. In fact, they made me feel as if I was totally overreacting and going overboard. Basically, everyone was taking it all in stride. I heard a lot of, “Their boys. What do you expect?” “It’s natural, that’s what boys do.” “Oh, girl! That’s nothing!” I seem to be the only mother/parent/person bothered by the fact that their teenage child and their friends may enjoy looking at pornographic images of women. Am I overreacting? Am I not well within my rights to be flabbergasted?

Seriously, I feel so lost. When did this become the societal norm? When did kids and porn, or teens and porn become socially acceptable? I swear, I feel so behind in the times. I completely missed the memo, in regards to this!

Back in the day, I remember the boys sneaking to look at their dad’s, uncle’s, older brother’s and cousin’s Playboy and Hustler magazines. I remember when they would cleverly watch the XXX rated video tape that was left in the VCR. Once they finished watching, they’d rewind the tape back to the exact spot where they initially found it. Point is, the kids got their hands on the porn back in the day too,  but it was accessed sneakily.

Upon speaking with my oldest boy, I nearly went into a series of convulsions, when I learned that he and his friends have adopted the same lack-a-daisy mindset, that it is normal to look at porn. They also think that it’s okay to exchange sexual images by way of their cellular phones and email accounts (which is another topic, to be discussed at a later date). They said, “Everyone does it! It’s no big deal.”

In my opinion, teens are going beyond pushing the envelope, while adults are just so carefree. I previously read an article written by another concerned mom, in regards to her teenage son watching porn on his laptop, and the comments she received were pretty nasty. She was completely villainized by the readers. For the most part, they felt like she was out of line for looking through his laptop. They said she completely embarrassed him and violated his trust. They also said that he wasn’t engaging in anything abnormally. The comments went on for days.  Although I didn’t leave a comment, I was totally on the side of the mother. I, too, feel like some things are to be reserved for adults and your adult years. I don’t think that it’s okay or acceptable for my teenage son or daughter to seek out pornographic images on the computer, their cellular phones or any other technological device. I refuse to believe that I’m the only mother/adult who feels this way. Whatever your opinion, I’d love to hear it. What’s your perspective on the matter? Have you had to deal with it? If so, how did you handle it?

All perspectives are respected.

 

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Grieving Anew….

I’m not big on death. Who is, huh?

I don’t deal with death at all. I ignore it and keep on. I refuse to give much energy to it. I don’t go view bodies. I don’t go to funerals. I don’t sit around mourning (at least not for very long). Usually I direct all of my energy towards the happy times, and I remember the individual how I last seen them. That’s my approach when it comes to dealing with the crushing blow that death always deals.

But, this time was different. Very different.

It wasn’t only me who was forced to deal with this completely unexpected and devastating lost of life.  My youngest son was also pulled into the madness. In all actuality he was much more affected than even I — because he lost his father. Thus, I didn’t have the option of ignoring or shutting the matter of death out. I was forced out of my usual routine and into a very inconvenient position of having to deal with death.

Long story short,

My son turns out to be a lot like me. He doesn’t want to be sad and he doesn’t want to sit around crying however, he does want to talk about it in snippets.

So whenever the urge hits him, he’ll ask a question, make a statement or just come lay his head on my lap. And me?  I fully engage with him. I follow his lead. Whatever and wherever that may be.

His way of dealing with this, it’s not all that bad. It has actually helped me to deal with yet another unexpected death (YES! Barely a week later, death reared its ugly head in my space again!).

Thanks for each and every comment, thought, suggestion and prayer. All has been truly appreciated!

 

Be sure to tune in for a guest blog entitled “A Day at the Houston Zoo” constructed by my eight year old son, Patrick!

 

 

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Your Dad is Dying

I share an 8-year-old boy with an awesome dad. Biologically, our son is his only child. Words can not and will never be able to describe how much my son’s dad loves him, and how much my son loves his dad in return.

Every single morning, his dad calls to tell him good morning, have a great day and how much his “daddy loves him”. Every afternoon, his dad calls him after school to see what he learned, how his day went and to tell him how much his “daddy loves him”. Every evening, shortly after the sunsets,  the phone is ringing. Everyone already knows who it is, so no need to check the caller ID. We  just hand the telephone over to the littlest boy because we all know that it’s his dad.  No if’s, no and’s, no but’s about it. His dad MUST tell him goodnight, that he’ll call him in the morning and he most definitely has to always end the call with “daddy loves you”.

Those were the last words that we heard from him, this past Sunday evening, as the littlest boy had turned on the speakerphone, in order to talk on the telephone and play the video game simultaneously.

“Daddy loves you!”

When I heard him say that, my thoughts were, “He ain’t lying! He really does love him…..always has!”

How do you tell an 8-year-old boy that he won’t have that anymore? How do explain that, that has now been taken away? No more phone calls! No more pictures! No more spending time together! None of that! No more!

How can I ask my innocent little boy to get out of the routine of having his daddy call him EVERY SINGLE DAY (without EVER missing a beat) if only to utter the words, “daddy loves you”?

We’ve never known the whole “clinging to life” situation. Nor has death been this close to us before. I’m being forced to explain, “You’ve done nothing wrong. It’s not your fault. That how’s life/death is. You’ll get to see him again, one day.”

If that’s not unfair, I don’t know what is!

Thank you for all of you who have prayed for different results and/or our comfort during this time. We are truly grateful.

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If Only My Kids Would…..

Listen, hear and process the valuable lessons that are being handed down and over to them.

Nothing satisfies a mother/parent more than knowing that they’ve efficiently equipped their children to handle the ways of this world!

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I’m Most Afraid Of

Disappointing them…..

 

I just don’t want to let them down!

No parent does.

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