Two years ago, I wrote a blog post about how oral sex, amongst teens had become quite the “norm”. I remember how stunned I was, when I learned that my teenage son and his friends were receiving oral sex from two girls who they’d grown up with since they were Kindergarten age. That was the last thing, I expected to be going on with the kids on my block. After I came to grips with the behavior that our kids were engaging in , I had the famous and very long “talk” with my son. At the conclusion of our “talk” I pretty much knew that my words had fallen on death ears. He wasn’t going to stop or turn back into my sweet, innocent and undefiled child, in fact I knew that he was only going to up the ante and push the envelope even further. His hormones had been unleashed and set free, and there was nothing that I was going to be able to do, to curtail it.
Fast forward to today, oral sex is a thing of the past and they’ve vivaciously moved on to full-blown bang down sex! I knew this day was coming, but I never thought I’d see the day when a mother would allow teenage, high school boys (who you don’t really know) to come into her home and have sex with her daughter, as if they’re married adults. I’m completely baffled. Am I old school? Am I out of touch?
Okay. I get it. Teens are having sex. Yes. They’re doing it, plain and simple. I get all of that. But when did it become ideal to co-sign them having sex? When did the parents start actively assisting their children and making it vastly comfortable for them to be sexually active, particularly under their own roofs?
I finally accepted that my innocent baby boy is long gone, and I only have memories of him etched into my mind to rely on. I’m just now starting to wrap my head around the fact that girls are throwing themselves at his feet and they’ve made themselves readily available to him. But what I’ve refused to ever accept is that of willing participant. As a teen especially, but not even as an adult will he EVER have my blessing when it comes to his sexual life.
If I’m stuck in the past, then so be it. That’s where I’ll stay, before I ever say it’s okay for any of my children to march someone or anyone through the doors of my house, up to their bedrooms and engage in sexual acts with them. Not happening!
Let’s have a conversation: What’s your perspective? Do I need to get with the times? Do you care about being the “cool” parent to your child and their friends? Would you allow your house to be “that” house where all the kids flock to, to get it in?
4writermom 