{Wordless Wednesday} Wanted: Mate

My name is Lonely Lue
Once upon a time I was one of two
At first I was fond of my new ly found single status
but I soon realized that I’m bad at this
being single thing, that is!
So if you see my better half
Can  you tell her to please come back?
Cause soon our  job over here will be through
and I want to go charity as two!

We seriously can’t find the mate to this shoe. It’s been missing in our apartment for two months!

Happy Wordless Wednesday

Where the hell I’ve been all year!

My intentions were to increase the number of blog post that I make every week in 20-13. I thought I’d start this new way of blogging on the first day  of the New Year, but turns out that wasn’t the case.
To my surprise I wasn’t mentally ready to write each and every day, like I thought I was.
What I found out was, I needed to think.
I needed to seriously sit down and think. I needed to reflect on what was going on in my life and all of the thoughts swirling around in my head.
Like most people, seems I have plenty going on. Most of which will make pretty interesting blog posts and discussions.
So, I’m finally organized (which turns out, is KEY!) and I’ve set an agenda for my blogging, as well as for my other writings.

Up first: open letters. Since “open letters” are all the rage, I might as well share a few of mines. I have some penned to my daughters, my sons, the deadbeat dads, my own fabulous mom and dad, fake friends…..just to name a few. This oughta be real interesting, eh?
I’m really looking forward to sharing my undefined, variety filled blog with all of you this year…..and  for many more years to come!

 

 

 

Dooney Boy!

This post is in honor of the most dependent, yet my thoughtful member of our household: Mr. Dooney Bourke D.

Dooney
HOT MESS in action!!!

Dooney has been a part of our family for the last y years. He was given to us by a long time friend because of his anxious and destructive behavior. Needless to say, he has been very destructive in our home, but he’s still overly anxious (separation anxiety to the MAX!). We when relocated from Michigan I thought about giving him to another family, because we didn’t know what to expect with the big move. I knew that whom ever I placed him with would have to be extremely patient, retired, boring, financially stable and an over-the-top dog lover. I knew the chances of me finding someone to meet that criteria would be slim to none, which is how he wound up moving to Texas with us. Plus, I just couldn’t and didn’t want to leave him behind. He is a unit of our family and we love him too much to abandon him!

Dooney
So Fresh and So Clean!!!

 

You’re Grown, Huh?

It’s not to often that my biggest girl does anything shocking or anything that’ll cause my jaw to drop. For the most part, she wants to stay on my good side and off of my blog and social media rants. She treads very lightly. She knows exactly how far to go before the wrath of momma comes in and takes over. So, imagine my surprise when my “conscientious” child took it upon herself to make a decision without being totally certain that she had my 100% guaranteed approval.  Needless to say, the biggest girl has made finally made her “it’s all about you…and not in a good way” blog post debut!

Well, about a month back my soon-to-be 14 year old,  made a decision unbeknownst to me. It was a choice that left me at a complete lost for words. I was so shocked that my jaw did actually drop. I was so shocked that I’m only now able to write a post about it!

This is how the oldest gal has looked for the last two years. This is who we’re all used to seeing on a daily basis. Okay? And like this:

One night while I was sitting out at the fire pit enjoying the company of a few friends and spirits, she and the littlest boy came over to reveal that she now looks like this!

(eye bulges practically out of my head!)

Here’s another view!

Oh! And, here’s a black and white view. Yeah, she’s taking black and white photos, too! 0_O

Although cutting her hair was something that we’d briefly discussed. I was shocked that she went and did it without me. I also felt like she did it sneakily because she waited until I was outside of the house and fully engaged with friends. Then she came strutting over to the fire pit area where we were sitting with a hoodie on, let me remind you that it was 80+ degrees outside. When I questioned her about the hoodie that’s when she  revealed her “haircut”.

Smart girl, huh? To do her big reveal while I was surrounded by people who would downplay the situation and keep me calm? She had it all well planned out, if I must say so.

I guess more than anything this hair cutting situation made me realize that my biggest gal is closer to be grown up, than she is to being a baby. She’s branching out more, becoming her own person, liking her own things and using her voice…..(respectfully, of course!)

So, I am learning to loosen up and let go a little bit. I always thought I’d welcome stages like this, but I’m more sad than I am happy.

It’s not about her cutting her hair, its way bigger than that.

She’s not my little four pound, twelve ounce preemie anymore. She’s growing up.

It was bound to happen!

 

 

Piercings and Tattoos? My Boy? NO WAY!

It’s no surprise that the oldest boy has increased the amount of pressure and stepped up his daily harassment, hoping desperately to sway me into saying, “Yes. You can go get a tattoo, son!”

See, he thinks it was his tactic of never-ending harassment  that worked in his favor several weeks ago, when I finally allowed him to get his ears pierced (after three years of nonstop asking). He hasn’t figured out that it wasn’t because of his begging, constant pleading and nagging which caused him to receive my blessing with the piercing of the ears. I only said yes because I felt that he’d put enough time and thought into “why” he really wanted his ears pierced.

I have an extremely huge problem when it comes to fads and that “going along with the crowd” mentality. I don’t participate in trends and I refuse to let my child be part of a trend. I wanted to be absolutely certain that he wasn’t doing something because it’s popular or because all of his buddies are doing it, which is why it took me several years before saying yes. For me, his reason for wanting his ears pierced had to be something that he deeply desired to do with no outside influences. He doesn’t know it, but the same thing applies to getting a tattoo. I wouldn’t care if he got tattoo after tattoo after tattoo. Heck! My mom took me to get my first tattoo when I just sixteen years old, so of course I don’t have a problem with them. My only concern was, his reason behind wanting tattoos and ear piercings.

It’s been close to the two-year mark of his just having to “have a tattoo”. He’s thought it through and through. He’s even constructed what he wants to get and he’s explained the significance behind it. I must admit that it’s quite unique and I’ve never seen anyone with anything like it before. I’m pretty proud of him. Everything that I’ve instilled in him about being different, standing out, individuality and embracing his unique identity, he’s gotten it! Through both of these incidences I finally see that all of my efforts haven’t been in vain afterall.

I think it’s safe to say, the time has come for me to grant my oldest boy my blessing yet again. Tattoo numero uno soon to come!

 

My first tattoo (it’s now 19 years old). My youngest boy took this pic. Thank him for the flash and time stamp! #dontblameme

Grieving Anew….

I’m not big on death. Who is, huh?

I don’t deal with death at all. I ignore it and keep on. I refuse to give much energy to it. I don’t go view bodies. I don’t go to funerals. I don’t sit around mourning (at least not for very long). Usually I direct all of my energy towards the happy times, and I remember the individual how I last seen them. That’s my approach when it comes to dealing with the crushing blow that death always deals.

But, this time was different. Very different.

It wasn’t only me who was forced to deal with this completely unexpected and devastating lost of life.  My youngest son was also pulled into the madness. In all actuality he was much more affected than even I — because he lost his father. Thus, I didn’t have the option of ignoring or shutting the matter of death out. I was forced out of my usual routine and into a very inconvenient position of having to deal with death.

Long story short,

My son turns out to be a lot like me. He doesn’t want to be sad and he doesn’t want to sit around crying however, he does want to talk about it in snippets.

So whenever the urge hits him, he’ll ask a question, make a statement or just come lay his head on my lap. And me?  I fully engage with him. I follow his lead. Whatever and wherever that may be.

His way of dealing with this, it’s not all that bad. It has actually helped me to deal with yet another unexpected death (YES! Barely a week later, death reared its ugly head in my space again!).

Thanks for each and every comment, thought, suggestion and prayer. All has been truly appreciated!

 

Be sure to tune in for a guest blog entitled “A Day at the Houston Zoo” constructed by my eight year old son, Patrick!

 

 

Your Dad is Dying

I share an 8-year-old boy with an awesome dad. Biologically, our son is his only child. Words can not and will never be able to describe how much my son’s dad loves him, and how much my son loves his dad in return.

Every single morning, his dad calls to tell him good morning, have a great day and how much his “daddy loves him”. Every afternoon, his dad calls him after school to see what he learned, how his day went and to tell him how much his “daddy loves him”. Every evening, shortly after the sunsets,  the phone is ringing. Everyone already knows who it is, so no need to check the caller ID. We  just hand the telephone over to the littlest boy because we all know that it’s his dad.  No if’s, no and’s, no but’s about it. His dad MUST tell him goodnight, that he’ll call him in the morning and he most definitely has to always end the call with “daddy loves you”.

Those were the last words that we heard from him, this past Sunday evening, as the littlest boy had turned on the speakerphone, in order to talk on the telephone and play the video game simultaneously.

“Daddy loves you!”

When I heard him say that, my thoughts were, “He ain’t lying! He really does love him…..always has!”

How do you tell an 8-year-old boy that he won’t have that anymore? How do explain that, that has now been taken away? No more phone calls! No more pictures! No more spending time together! None of that! No more!

How can I ask my innocent little boy to get out of the routine of having his daddy call him EVERY SINGLE DAY (without EVER missing a beat) if only to utter the words, “daddy loves you”?

We’ve never known the whole “clinging to life” situation. Nor has death been this close to us before. I’m being forced to explain, “You’ve done nothing wrong. It’s not your fault. That how’s life/death is. You’ll get to see him again, one day.”

If that’s not unfair, I don’t know what is!

Thank you for all of you who have prayed for different results and/or our comfort during this time. We are truly grateful.

First Day of Summer: Graduation 2012

Tonight one of my good girlfriend’s daughter graduated from high school. She attended one of the best academic schools in the city. I was absolutely jaw-dropped  shocked at the academic excellence of the vast majority of the students.

My mommy radar immediately went up and I began to strategize just how I’m going to get my own children focused on the exact same path of academic excellence.

I want that! I want my children to be amongst the top members of their class (if asking for them to be one of the top ten is too much). I want them to be recognized for their academic brilliance. Most importantly, I want the security in knowing that they’re going to be already in this life…..in this world.

This first day of summer vacay actually turned out to better than what I could’ve ever wanted it to be. A new desire was planted in me and now I’m going to see it to fruition.

The Last Day

Today signifies the last of a few different things. Today’s the last day of my first-time ever participating in a blogathon (Post a Day in May). Today was also the last day of school for my children. It was the last day, of my oldest daughter being a middle-schooler. Much has been accomplished and many milestones surpassed, and I couldn’t be any prouder. Each of us feels accomplished in our own individual right.

Tomorrow ushers in a new month, it also bring news challenges along with it. Nothing will come that we cannot handle or at least to attempt to handle. For now though, we’re going to enjoy the fruits of all of our labor.

So long to the month of May 2012.

A Day at the Park

Today was the last full day that it’ll be just the little’s and I. Tomorrow is the last of school for the big’s and it’s a half day! The little’s and I decided to party it up one last time, before we’ll have to include the big’s in on our fun. We went to the park…….

I see you!

Zay! Look! Is that?

Wooooo! I think it is!

Let’s get outta here!

Wait one quick rock, on the rockie!

Hey! Where’d Sista’ go?

I’m outta here! I said one QUICK rock! C’mon slow poke!

Ahhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!

Double Ahhhhhhh!!!!!!!

No one said anything about vulture birds lurking around the kiddie playscape! I need answers!